TRAUMA THERAPY: IS IT NORMAL TO FEEL WORSE BEFORE YOU FEEL BETTER?
If you are considering trauma therapy, you deserve to know what it entails so that you can make informed decisions for yourself about whether, when, and with who you want to undertake it. One reality of trauma therapy that may not be obvious is that it is common for individuals to feel worse before they feel better. Why is this and how can you appropriately evaluate potential risks and benefits of treatment? Keep reading to find out.
Why You Might Feel Worse First
Not everyone will feel worse in the initial phases of trauma therapy. Some people find that they feel empowered or purposeful taking action to address traumatic events that have harmed them. Others, however, might notice increased discomfort. This discomfort can take a number of forms, including increased anxiety, thinking about traumatic experiences/memories more frequently, trauma-related content showing up in dreams, anger, grief, or physical symptoms (e.g., headaches or stomach aches, feeling on edge, fatigue, muscle tension).
Why might this happen? In trauma therapy, we stop avoiding and minimizing. We acknowledge that which has happened, the pain it has caused, and the negative impacts it has had on a person’s life. We confront difficult memories, hold space for all emotions, work toward embodiment, and grieve that which was lost or never had. It is beautiful work and also intense work, and some people feel the effects of that intensity outside the therapy room.
What You Can Do About It
In truth, any type of therapy should be somewhat uncomfortable. People come to therapy to achieve personal growth, and we don’t grow when we stay inside our comfort zones. There is a big difference, however, between discomfort and re-traumatization. To ensure that you do not experience the latter, some things to think about include:
Your timing. There is no perfect time to engage in trauma therapy, but there are times that are better than others. If you are experiencing major stress or transition, such as divorce, job loss, moving, or the death of a loved one, you may not have the bandwidth to take on healing past trauma too. In general, trauma therapy tends to go most smoothly when baseline stability is present in a person’s daily life.
Your communication with your therapist. Your therapist is your guide and partner in this work. Lean on them! Express any concerns or anxieties you have about trauma therapy from the get-go so that you and your therapist can work through them together. Once you are engaged in active trauma processing work, keep your therapist informed of any new or worsening symptoms that come up, if applicable, so that they can support you through them.
Your self-care plan. Decide ahead of time what you will do after your trauma therapy sessions or anytime between sessions when you feel activated or triggered to help yourself settle and re-center in the present. Collaborate with your therapist on this plan and elicit their help to fill in any gaps in coping strategies if needed.
Weighing the Pros & Cons
Nobody relishes the idea of subjecting themselves to an experience that will make them feel worse. But is it worth it to do so in the case of trauma therapy? My answer is a resounding yes. The benefits of trauma therapy are so many, including significant reduction or elimination of mental health symptoms, greater peace of mind and wellbeing, the power to live in the present, enhanced relationships with self and others, and the ability to make sense and meaning of the trauma.
Moreover, there is a phenomenon called posttraumatic decline that is important to note. Traumatic experiences and symptoms, once established, generally don’t resolve on their own and can in fact worsen with time if left untreated. Given this reality, many trauma survivors will experience significantly more suffering and impairment if they let trauma remain unaddressed than if they proactively work through it in the appropriate therapeutic environment.
The choice to start trauma therapy belongs to you and you alone. You may never feel 100% ready, and that is okay. With the right therapist and appropriate planning and preparation work, you can weather the temporary increase in distress you may experience in taking on this difficult yet profound and courageous work.
Please note: This content is for informational and educational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional diagnosis or treatment. Always seek the advice of a licensed mental health provider or other healthcare professional for guidance related to your specific mental health or medical concerns.
